The Boys

Dan McLean, United States Marine Corps

When I joined the Marines, it was fast-paced from the second I joined, and I had never been in an environment like that before, so it was a get-with-the-program-or-get-left-behind situation from day one. And I loved it! The trainings and deployments were nonstop which left no time to really think about what I would do afterward for the rest of my life. But when they put a reenlistment package in front of me and basically said I either signed it or get out that week, I decided to get out of the Marines. However, once I got out, it was just as tough for me, if not tougher. There was no time to prepare for the sudden loss of structure and the absence of someone telling me what I needed to do. It was a whole new world, but thankfully I had quite a few veterans in the family supporting me.

The worst part for me that no one ever really talked about is missing “the boys.” I found myself missing a shared sense of purpose. And the brotherhood. These were the people I had spent the last four years with, nearly every single day. We went through training together, we deployed together, and we had gotten each other through our worst days and nights. They understood me, got my jokes, and then before I knew it, they were gone. It was difficult to adjust to civilian life and to find a level of connection and understanding with others. But over time, the uncomfortable feeling started to fade and even though me and the boys have all gone our separate ways, there will always be those awesome memories that will never fade.

I think the worst thing you can do when you get out is to become lethargic. Always take some time to reset and have a plan for the future, both short-term and long-term, which will get you to your goals. Also, I always stay connected with my buddies, whether it is through social media or occasional meetups. I think the best way I have kept in touch with the boys is by having a group chat so that whenever we find photos or think of a good story, we share it. The transition from military to civilian life is not easy, but you can lessen the stress by taking the initiative. Reach out to all of the resources available to veterans and ensure your own success. With time, it is possible to find a sense of purpose and connection in civilian life while still honoring the experiences and relationships that were formed during military service.